Ornamental Obliteration

For every bubbly holiday enthusiast who revels in the joy, glad tidings, and glittery magic of the season there is somebody else who is simmering silently behind a forced smile as Christmas-related stress eats them up inside.

Fat Daddy’s bar in Walker’s Point offers a release for those pushed to the brink by that seemingly endless list of tasks and omnipresent corny music. Each December, they sell Christmas ornaments for patrons to smash.

Ornaments are available for purchase individually or, for those who are completely Santa-ed out, in buckets. Then, it’s time to let loose and deck the halls, walls, and floors with tiny shards of shimmering glass.

Each one of the bulbs contains a slip of colored paper. If there’s an orange one inside, the hurler wins a prize. They’re giving away gift cards to local restaurants, parties at the bar, a grill, a beer pong table, and lots of other cool things you wouldn’t be rewarded with if you started smashing Christmas decorations at home.

There is the matter of the glimmering mess, which the cleaning crew handles. Since Fat Daddy’s has beach volleyball during summer, it’s nothing they can’t handle. It’s a matter of trading sand for some glitter and the remnants of thousands of glass bulbs.

Ornament-tossing season goes through the end of the month, so there’s still time to squeeze in a few festive fastballs if the next few days make you crack. Otherwise, be ready to get your Christmas smashing done early next year.